June 15 marked the 3rd year since Mom was senselessly taken from her family and friends. It is hard to believe it has been 3 years, then again, it still feels like it happened this morning. It is still devastating to think that an individual who was so greedy and selfish thought he could take her life. He ended up taking more than just that…he took her away from being an incredible part in her family and friends day-to-day experiences, growth, celebrations, and even the hard times.
Mom was always a voice of reason, good and encouraging advice giver, a wonderful example set for us all, a faithful follower, and the biggest cheerleader I ever knew!
I miss her and recall daily conversations with her. I hear her voice saying things…some of her expressions, visualizing her facial expressions and mannerisms…I sure do miss those things!
Life is different for sure, it is not better without her, there are just some days it is empty without her here. We do go on and make the best of each day and focus on the strength and joy that our Lord, Jesus Christ gives us. A wonderful provision he has offered to us. He knows the pain and the emptiness we still feel. He knows the comfort to place within our souls! He knows the frustration, the disappointment, the questions we still have.
I still get so aggravated this all happened, that we didn’t get to grieve normally, we didn’t get to say goodbye. Instead, we were forced to jump right in, without a net-or our mother, to the ridiculousness of what happened. The murderer, totally a ridiculous person. To this day, I am thankful for the conviction and the sentencing he received.
Still, in all the frustration and disappointment, I see love and clarity through those people who have carried us on every step, high-on their shoulders and heart. I recount often those who were with us from the very beginning and are still with us, praying and supporting us. The love of these is amazing in itself and I am thankful and humbly gracious. Please know you and your kindness will remain close to my heart and moves me every time of I think of you collectively and individually. I know too, your heart still aches and I pray for you too!
Thank you for your love for Mom and for all of us!